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Parenting Pathfinders: Tools for Raising Responsible Children - Section 5

Parenting Pathfinders Track  Structures for Children

1.5.0. Exercise


 

1.5.1. Life-long encouragement

Pathfinders role model for their children the importance of making a healthy exercise program a part of their life-style. They encouraged their children to develop interests in sports and other exercise activities which have a good probability of being continued over the entire life-span. Walking, running, roller skating, ice skating, skiing, cycling, rowing, swimming, water skiing, tennis, racquetball, volleyball, rope jumping, hand ball, squash, basketball, and soft-ball are just a few exercise activities which children can expect to carry on into adulthood. Parents role model making a minimum of 30 minutes of aerobic exercise a daily scheduled activity to insure good health, increased energy level, and stress reduction.

Natural consequences:

  • If you do not get enough healthy exercise in your life, then you will experience fatigue, unwanted weight gain and possible ill health.
  • If you do not get enough healthy exercise in your life, then you will not have a healthy outlet to rid yourself of the stress and anxiety which builds up in you in the normal course of living.

Logical consequences:

  • If you do not exercise on a regular basis on your own, then we will institute a scheduled daily exercise program which you will be expected to participate in as if it were a daily required task.
  • If you do not exercise daily, then we will make you responsible for the medical bills which you incur in the future.

 

1.5.2. Team sports

Pathfinders help their children develop a balance of exercise activities between individual and team sports. They avoid encouraging their children to only play in team sports for exercise. They encourage their children to develop individual exercise programs which can replace the team sports which the children may outgrow or lose interest in. These parents provide their children with a whole array of alternatives for exercise which will stay with them over their life-span.

Natural consequences:

  • If you do not have individual exercise and sports activities besides the group and team sports you are currently involved in, then you will be hard pressed in latter life to maintain a healthy program of exercise which is satisfying to you.
  • If you do not have enough exercise in the team sports you are currently involved in, then you are not getting the amount of exercise necessary to maintain your good health.

Logical consequences:

  • If you do not have individual exercise and sports activities, then we will initiate a daily schedule of them for your participation so as to insure you physical health.
  • If you do not spend time in physical exercise on your own, now that you are participating in this team sport, then we may be forced to make you drop the team sport in order for you to resume your individual health enhancing exercise program.

 

1.5.3. Handling sports competition

Pathfinders encourage their children to recognize that sports are primarily for exercise and fun. They do not overly stress the importance of winning and beating others in the competition involved. They do not allow their children to remain on teams where their coaches over emphasize winning at all costs. They only allow their children to remain on teams on which all players get a chance to play equitably and enjoy themselves. Pathfinders advocate with the team sports coaches to insure that children are held responsible for earning the right to play. They seek to encourage the use of requiring meeting homelife responsibilities as the vehicle to earn playing in the sport. They do not allow good players to become crowned as "Prince" or "Princess" around their homes, exempt from meeting family rules and obligations. Pathfinders strive to insure that good athletes are not pressured beyond what is normal to build their bodies or shape themselves into professional level amateurs. They strive to assist their children have enjoyable sports experiences which will encourage them to continue a life time of healthy exercise and sports participation.

Natural consequences:

  • If you are too caught up in winning in sports competition, then you will lose the benefits of your participation which are exercise and fun.
  • If you participate to your fullest potential in a sport and are not able to win in competition, you are still a winner because you are experiencing the benefits of the sport, exercise, and fun.
  • If you a winner on the sports field you are still expected to maintain your everyday responsibilities at home and in school.

Logical consequences:

  • If you are over involved in the "winning at all costs" in your sport's activities, we will not allow your continued participation unless you relax and begin to have fun and healthy exercise in the process.
  • If you are successful in sports and come home with a "better than thou" attitude, then we will be forced to make you drop sports unless your attitude changes.
  • If your sport's team coach does not allow you to learn that the goal of the game is playing your best and not just winning, then we will ask the coach to change his attitude or we will remove you from that team.

 

1.5.4. Vicarious sports lives

Pathfinders avoid living their competitive sports dreams and hopes vicariously through their children. They are clear with themselves and their spouses why they encourage their children to participate in competitive sports. The goal being that the children benefit from the experience and grow in an appreciation for their own skills and abilities. Parents strive to help children enter sports which give them exercise and a good outlet for stress reduction. They do not allow their children to remain in sports activities which increase and exacerbate stress in their lives. Pathfinders feel good enough about themselves that they do not need their children to become heros on the sports fields to make them feel successful in life.

Natural consequences:

  • If you participate in competitive sports which are well organized, you will gain from the experience and feel better about yourself.
  • If you participate in team sports which are well organized, you gain an appreciation of team effort and cooperation in a competitive atmosphere which will prepare you well for latter life.

Logical consequences:

  • If you are participating to please one or both of your parents and you are not enjoying it anymore, then we will not allow you to continue to participate.
  • If you are experiencing increased stress in your life because of your participation in a sport, then we will not allow you to continue in the sport unless you can begin to have fun and relax with it.
  • If you feel one or both of your parents are expecting you to play in a sport in order for them to feel more fulfilled and successful in their own lives, then you have permission to say so and drop out of the sport.

1.5.5. Family exercise

Pathfinders encourage their children to participate in family based exercise. These parents engage their children in a variety of athletic activities which give them a vast experience to call upon when choosing life-long exercises to continue once they leave home. These parents participate with their children in a willing way to role model adults' need for exercise in their lives. To emphasize this need for family exercise, the parents arrange for the family members to try out a sport together which no one in the family had ever tried before. This new experience puts the children and adults at the same novice level. It encourages the children to take risks and try new healthy outlets for exercise and relaxation. Pathfinders' families include family exercise in their weekly schedule.

Natural consequences:

  • If you and the rest of the family exercise together, we all will experience mutual encouragement and support to continue to exercise for health on our own.
  • If you and the rest of the family exercise together, we will gain a greater appreciation of our individual differences and uniqueness of each other's personalities when it comes to reducing stress and maintaining personal health.
  • If we exercise together, we will learn to relax, let off steam and have fun together.

Logical consequences:

  • If you do not participate with us in our family exercises, then we will not make room in our schedule for those times you have asked for, which require us to go out of our way to bring you to your own special activities.
  • If you do not want to do exercise with us which we request, then do not expect us to automatically want to do other things you request of us.

 


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